It's My Birthday!

It's my birthday today. And Alba has been saying "Happy Birthday" to me for a week, "just in case she forgets." In fact, she was in such a hurry, that we celebrated on Sunday with some Chinese takeout from the Emerald Garden. (Alba has to work late all this week, so Sunday it was.)

Anyway, every year my parents usually get me an Amazon gift certificate, which is definitely the best present anyone could ever give me. I probably tithe my income to Amazon.com.

But the most memorable gift I ever received was from none other than Matt and Shelley...although they led me to believe it was from Ms. [grotesquely fat woman]...

One day, I'm hanging out with Matt and Shelley, when Shelley informs me, "Hey, The Stan, I have something for you from Ms. [grotesquely fat woman]!"

"Ms. [grotesquely fat woman]?" I ask.

"Yeah, she tried to catch you after church the other day, but you had already left. So she wanted me to give it to you."

"What is it?"

"I don't know," said Shelley, "It's a present."

"A present?"

"Yeah, it's your birthday this week, right?"

"Yeah...but how would Ms. [grotesquely fat woman] know?"

"I don't know, but she must have known because she gave me a present to give you."

"Have you been spending a lot of time with Ms. [grotesqely fat woman], Stan?" Matt asks.

"No!" I quickly deny. "Well...I guess I talk to her every now and then...It's hard to avoid her." Matt and Shelley chuckle. "But I wouldn't say I spend a lot of time with her."

"Well, you must have made quite an impression," Shelley says as Matt tries to conceal a smile, "because she got a present for you."

"Okaaay?" I say somewhat skeptically.

"But I forgot to bring it," Shelley says, slumping her shoulders and acting disappointed. Then, she brightens and says, "But we're having a little get together at my bungalo next weekend, why don't you come?"

Well, I can't refuse an invitation like that...Shelley bungalow nights are always full of fun and merryment!

Tomorrow...the rest of the story.

The Stan